6 “And I say, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove!

    I would fly away and be at rest;
7 yes, I would wander far away;
    I would lodge in the wilderness; Selah
8 I would hurry to find a shelter
    from the raging wind and tempest.”
After coming to the end of all wishful thinking and every thought based on defensive hope I started to pray these verses. God provided that safe place through legal separation and soon it will be divorce. I woke up in the middle of the night saying out loud “I hate divorce”. God hates it the same way I hate it. He hates the abuse that broke faith and covenant. As I look back it was a bit broken to begin with. To begin with things were terribly wrong but it’s did easy to be pulled in when one is young. 

Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB) holds more true to the grammar of the original Hebrew text of that verse that gets so misqued in Malachi, and is likely closer to the original intent, not every version says it the same.

“If he hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord God of Israel, “he covers his garment with injustice,” says the Lord of Hosts. Therefore, watch yourselves carefully, and do not act treacherously.

It’s the hardest thing to file, being the one to file because of injustice and hateful abusive things being said to me, things I wouldn’t say to my worst enemy because those things cut at the very core of ones being. God is just as grieved as I am and He has provided for me seperation and divorce as a safe place for me and my children. 

I still pray keep me in this safe place, just knowing 85 percent of women return to an abusive spouse. Divorce closes that door for me. I think it’s closed anyway but there is a vulnerability there if I don’t divorce. 

My thoughts on this Sunday morning. 

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